due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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