lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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