In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
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