No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Shame - the story of my life.
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