Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
