she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
