I faked an abortion last night.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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