He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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