we have officially lost it.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Randomize
