Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Bring me that man meat
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
