Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
