The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
