just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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