You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize