Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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