his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
