i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
