You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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