I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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