They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Go christen that room with your naked body.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
