Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
