Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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