I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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