my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
