but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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