he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize