He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
