Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I didn't shave. On purpose
if only i could text you this smell
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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