gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Your penis caused this!
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