when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
