dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
should my penis look like a turkey
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
