Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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