Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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