return my video game
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
