We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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