trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Boobs speak an international language.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
