he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize
