Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
