so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize
