Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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