I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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