was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
