Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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