Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
