I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
