Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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