Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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