my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Still dying that you shit outside
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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