I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
