i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
