btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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