I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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